Posted in about me

The Next Steps…

It isn’t just about what you love. It’s about what God created you to love so that you can use it to honor Him.

-Unknown

I graduated from Messiah college in May. It’s crazy how fast four years have gone by. I now have a degree in Christian Ministries.

I got a taste of what it’s like to lead my own ministry this summer when I worked in two different state owned campgrounds as a chaplain in the park. I led two services every Sunday. It was an incredible experience to worship in God’s creation every week.

Raystown Lake

When the summer came to an end, I packed up my car and drove down to Texas. I started at SMU Perkins. I’m on my way towards a Masters of Divinity (a pretty pretentious title if you ask me).

Perkins School of Theology

When I arrived in Texas I began doubting everything. I wasn’t sure that I was meant to be here. I felt lost. I attended orientation for school, and everyone seemed so sure that this is where they were meant to be.

I was overwhelmed. I was scared.

I made a quick decision that I wanted to go home. Thankfully, some of the faculty at Perkins stepped up and talked me down. They answered my questions, showed me they actually wanted me to be here. They showed me that they cared about me. Me, a person they didn’t even know.

I spent the weekend praying that I could see that I was on the right path. God took that prayer and opened my eyes.

God showed me that I am surrounded by amazing people. From the students, to the professors, to the faculty. God showed me that I am at a place meant to allow me to flourish. I’m being academically challenged while having the room to be me.

Not even a month went by when I hit a brick wall pretty hard. I had an unfortunate experience. I began to doubt again. I wasn’t sure how that fit into the picture. Plus I was still hanging on to the signs that God wanted me here. However, throughout that experience, God placed people even closer.

Through this experience, I have realized that I am loved here at Perkins. People want me to succeed. The “Perkins Hug” as I call it. I’ve been wrapped into the arms of all those around me.

Now it’s been two months, and I am beyond sure that this is where I am meant to be. God’s plan for me includes being here at Perkins. It’s a wonderful feeling to be back in the known and not lost in the unknown.

I am another step closer to reaching my goals. It has not been a perfect journey in the slightest, but it has been a journey in the arms of our savior and I couldn’t ask for a better journey.

So, friends, that is where I am.

One step closer to the calling I’m discerning daily.

One step closer, and yet onto the next steps…

Author:

Currently down the path to become a pastor in the United Methodist Church. I have suffered with anxiety for years and am hoping to bring comfort to those who suffer with anxiety without help from the church.

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